Wednesday, November 26, 2014
Become familiar with your wife's world. Create a love map. A love map is essentially a mental map about her, that speaks her native language listing unique characteristics about her by gathering as much information as possible about her, in order to simulate her environment, in your head.
While creating this map, sky is the limit for a loving husband. He should be able to make note of her life dreams, her hopes and aspirations, her fantasies, what she likes and dislikes in a spouse, the current stress she is undergoing, her favorite music and movies, the color and the shades she likes the most, her favorite and least favorite relatives, the dreams she had as a child. The love map you build should even contain her current cloth and shoe sizes - literally everything about her.
It is a process of continuous discovery. If she is working, be thoroughly familiar with her world. Learn where she parks her car, through which door she goes in, where she sits, what is on her desk and inside those drawers, those objects which make up her surroundings, who are her best friends at work, what are her daily challenges, what are her small wins, and what her needs are. In a nutshell, know her world in and out, just like his own world, along with those ever changing variables.
Ephesians 5:28 ESV In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
Your relationship will elevate to a profound new level once you understand the inner world in which your wife lives. This will take some time to learn, but it paves way to know more about her childhood, the way her parents and siblings treated her, certain trauma or fears she had from childhood, those things she accomplished and holds on dearly and proudly. Remember - her world is your world too.
Ephesians 5:31 ESV “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”
Create a love map of your spouse in such a manner that she becomes your best friend. Show interest in her so that she opens up and reveals more to you in a way she never has. This will establish an amazing and strong friendship with your wife. Seek to continuously update that map by probing what she is thinking, feeling and doing, so that you are aware of her ever changing environment and needs. Use clues from the love map you developed to buy her small, yet valuable gifts on those special occasions.
Lord Almighty, I ask you to provide insight into the world my wife lives in - both inside and outside our home. Strengthen her in her world so that she is not alone. Enable me to be part of her world, and allow me to share her burdens and happiness. I lift up all those troubles she is facing today and request you to heal them.