Saturday, May 8, 2010

BRS Results

Do stop by our class to see the BRS grades you received.  We will have it published on our class notice board as well as the Sunday school notice board.

May 08

I am done with correcting all your final exam papers.  Overall, you have done pretty good.  Some of you had the patience to write detailed answers, while some of you wanted to just finish the exam and hence did not write well.

One question that many of you stumbled upon was the Lord's Prayer.  Well - you knew most of it, but could not write it down properly without making errors.  You must have realized it yourself while taking the exam.  I had to deduct points for this - (yeah, it is a serious issue if you cannot recite that prayer).  We shall talk about the Lord's Prayer briefly when we met tomorrow.  I just cannot let you go to the next class without knowing that prayer.

Also, I plan to take a photo of our class when we meet tomorrow - so come dressed well.

See you tomorrow.

.

Face of an angel


They have halos that glow
As they cast a heavenly light
And their eyes often twinkle
Like a star in the night
They wear wings of silk
So sheer like lace
They have a look of innocence
That lies upon their face
They play a sweet melody
On a harp made of gold
While singing songs of hope
God's harmony, to cleanse our soul
Sometimes they visit our dreams
To comfort our fears
They speak in soft whisper
As we get lost in our tears
Though we may not see them
They watch us from the heavens above
They live in our hearts
Teaching us the true meaning of love
So when your in pain
And you feel as though your scared
And all alone
Remember the face of an angel
Her love will lead you back home

.

Ordinary Angels


Not all angels are in heaven;
not all angels have wings.
Some are just ordinary people,
who do ordinary things.

They carry their cross for Jesus
by the way they act and live.
And when the need arises,
of themselves they will give.

Quiet-like and unselfish,
for others they pave the way.
Though they never will admit it,
they often save the day.

They stand up for Christian values
and are honest and true.
They treat others with compassion,
with kindness, and love too.

Not all angels are in heaven;
not all angels have wings.
Some are just ordinary people
who do many Christ-like things.


Credits: Karen O'Leary

Before

A poem written by a mom:


Before I was a Mom;
I made and ate hot meals,
I had unstained clothing,
I brushed my hair every day,
I had quiet conversations on the phone,
I slept as late as I wanted and I slept all night long.

Before I was a Mom;
I cleaned my house each day,
I never tripped over toys or forgot lullabies,
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous,
I had never been puked on, pooped on, spit on, chewed on, peed on, or pinched by tiny fingers.

Before I was a Mom;
I never thought about immunizations,
I never held a screaming child so the doctors could give shots,
I never looked into teary eyes and cried,
I never felt my heart break into pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt,
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.

Before I was a Mom;
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down,
I never sat up late hours of the night watching a baby sleep,
I never got up in the middle of the night to make sure everything was okay,
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.

Before I was a Mom;
I had complete control of my mind, my thoughts and my body,
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside of my body,
I didn't know that having something so small could make me feel so important,
I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment, or the satisfaction of being a mom.

Before I was a Mom;
I never knew that something so small could effect my life so much,
I never knew that I could love someone so much,
I never knew I would love being a Mom,
I didn't know the bond between a Mother and her child,
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much.

.

Job Opening - Mother


JOB DESCRIPTION: 
Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work, in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required - including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties are also required; frequently, on very short notice.

RESPONSIBILITIES:
The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite your tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat - in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best, but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include, floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION:
Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you.

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE:
None required, unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION:
This job requires that you pay the kids, offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18, because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it, and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS: 
No health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered - however, this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life, if you play your cards right.

.

Meeting tomorrow - May 9

Let us plan on assembling in our classroom right after church.

I would like to discuss your answer sheets with you.  Further, this would be your opportunity to ask me any question(s) related to grading.

Finally, I have one small surprise waiting for you at the end of our meeting.

Look forward to seeing you tomorrow.

.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Not so perfect mothers


And then... God was almost done creating mothers.

"May I go now?" the almost completed, eager mother asked.

"Not yet. There are essential parts and finishing touches to be added," her Maker replied.

"I look pretty good to me," she said, peering into the crystal pool at her feet.

"True, you're looking better all the time. But bear with me."

"What does a mother have to do, God, besides wash, feed, and clothe little bodies?"

God only smiled and continued working.

"What are you doing now?" the curious mother-to-be questioned.

"Tightening your anger valve. If this doesn't work, everyone is in trouble."

She watched as He reached for the container marked patience.

"And what do I need patience for?" she asked as He poured in quite a supply.

"After a week you will know, my child."

"And whatever could that be?"

"This is your bypass mechanism. It enables a mother to operate efficiently for long periods of time without compliments from her children."

"I'm sure I won't need that."

"I'm sure you will."

Then God reached for a bundle labeled insulation against loud noises.

"You can skip that," she told him. "I don't mind a little noise."

"That's nice," He said.

Seeing all the energy He was preparing to give her, she shifted uneasily from one foot to the other. "I wouldn't need all that energy in a million years."

"Little you know. You will use all of this and be begging for more before long."

"I didn't know there was so much involved in being a mother. You're not just putting me on, are you?"

"No, little mother."

With much apprehension, "Are you sure I can handle the job?"

"Quite sure...with help. I'm always available when you need me."

"I'm glad to know that. What could I possible need all these for?"

"A certain amount of pain, so that you will be fully equipped to sympathize with and minister to the needs of your children when they feel pain; tears, so that you will be able to cry with them when they are hurt; and laughter to blend with theirs for happy times."

The mother-in-waiting fidgeted while God attached yes and no buttons. "Wouldn't it be nicer just to say yes to my children all the time?"

"Definitely not. Good mothers need to say no--and often. Say it with kindness and they will respect you for it."

"Have you equipped me with this thing called kindness, Lord?"

"I have indeed."

"And what about respect? Do I have to respect my children?"

"Absolutely."

The anxious mother tried to be patient as God installed a question answerer, advice giver, get along without sleep, and a pretender not to notice.

"I know I wouldn't use one of those!" she said, as God came toward her with a let-go lever.

"Sure you will, though it's hard. This is a vital piece of equipment. Until this little lever is released, your children will not have room to grow properly, make their own decisions, or develop their own personalities."

"I guess that is important."

God stood back a few steps to appraise His work, then reached for a coat of love and wrapped it around her. "Wear this at all times, and you'll be a good mother."

"Am I ready now, God, to get on with the mothering bit?"

"You can go now," God said gently. "You're not perfect, but you will do."

.

Real Mothers


Real mothers don't eat quiche; they don't have time to make it.

Real mothers know that their kitchen utensils are probably in the sandbox.

Real mothers often have sticky floors, filthy ovens, and happy kids.

Real mothers know that dried playdough doesn't come out of shag carpet.

Real mothers don't want to know what the vacuum just sucked up.

Real mothers sometimes ask "why me?" and get their answer when a little voice says, "because I love you best."

Real mothers know that a child's growth is not measured by height or years or grade... it is marked by the progression of Mama to Mommy to Mom...


Image credits: Thinkstock/Comstock/Thinkstock

Thank you

I never came to you, my friend,
and went away without
some new enrichment of the heart;
More faith and less of doubt,
more courage in the days ahead.
And often in great need coming to you,
I went away comforted indeed.
How can I find the shining word,
the glowing phrase that tells all that
your love has meant to me,
all that your friendship spells?
There is no word, no phrase for
you on whom I so depend.
All I can say to you is this,
God bless you precious friend.

.

Gift of friendship

Friendship is a Priceless Gift
that cannot be bought or sold,

But its value is far greater
than a mountain made of Gold.

For gold is cold and lifeless,
it can neither see nor hear...

And in the time of trouble
It is powerless to cheer...

It has no ears to listen
Nor heart to understand,

It cannot bring you comfort
or reach out a helping hand.

So when you ask God for a gift
be thankful if HE sends...

Not diamonds, pearls or riches...
But The Love of Real True Friends.

.

Flight Announcements


Here are some real examples of airline announcements that have been heard or reported:

On a Southwest flight (SW has no assigned seating, you just sit where you want) passengers were apparently having a hard time choosing, when a flight attendant announced, "People, people we're not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it!"

On a Continental Flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."

On landing, the stewardess said, "Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have.

"There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane"

"Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."

After a particularly rough landing during thunder- storms in Memphis, a flight attendant on a Northwest flight announced, "Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted."

From a Southwest Airlines employee: "Welcome aboard Southwest Flight 245 to Tampa.. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised."

"In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favorite."

"Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we'll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than Southwest Airlines."

"Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and, in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments."

"As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses."

And from the pilot during his welcome message: "Delta Airlines is pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!"

Heard on Southwest Airlines just after a very hard landing in Salt Lake City: The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "That was quite a bump, and I know what y'all are thinking. I'm here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault, it was the asphalt."

Overheard on an American Airlines flight into Amarillo, Texas, on a particularly windy and bumpy day: During the final approach, the Captain was really having to fight it. After an extremely hard landing, the Flight Attendant said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Amarillo. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what's left of our airplane to the gate!"

Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: "We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."

An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the Passengers exited, smile, and give them a "Thanks for flying our airline." He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said, "Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?" "Why, not, Ma'am," said the pilot. "What is it?" The little old lady said, "Did we land, or were we shot down?"

After a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix, the attendant came on with, "Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Capt.Crash and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt against the gate. And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the warning bells are silenced, we'll open the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal."

Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: "We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of USAirways."

Heard on a Southwest Airline flight. "Ladies and gentlemen, if you wish to smoke, the smoking section on this airplane is on the wing and if you can light 'em, you can smoke 'em."

A plane was taking off from KennedyAirport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax... "OH, MY GOD!" Silence followed, and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said,"Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier. While I was talking to you, the flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!"

.

A teacher's advice

Many years ago a teacher whose husband unexpectedly died suddenly of a heart attack, shared some of her insight with a classroom of students.

As the late afternoon sunlight came streaming in through the classroom windows and the class was nearly over, she moved a few things aside on the edge of her desk and sat down there.

With a gentle look of reflection on her face, she paused and said, "Before class is over, I would like to share with all of you a thought that is unrelated to class, but which I feel is very important.

Each of us is put here on earth to learn, share, love, appreciate and give of ourselves. None of us knows when this fantastic experience will end.

It can be taken away at any moment. Perhaps this is God's way of telling us that we must make the most out of every single day."

Her eyes beginning to water, she went on, "So I would like you all to make me a promise. From now on, on your way to school, or on your way home, find something beautiful to notice. It doesn't have to be something you see - it could be a scent, perhaps of freshly baked bread wafting out of someone's house, or it could be the sound of the breeze slightly rustling the leaves in the trees, or the way the morning light catches one autumn leaf as it falls gently to the ground.

Please look for these things, and cherish them. For, although it may sound trite to some, these things are the stuff" of life. The little things we are put here on earth to enjoy. The things we often take for granted. We must make it important to notice them, for at any time - it can all be taken away."

The class was completely quiet. The students picked up their books and filed out of the room silently. That afternoon, the author noticed more things on my way home from school than he had that whole semester. Every once in a while, the author think of that teacher and remember what an impression she made on all of them, and he tries to appreciate all of those things that sometimes we all overlook.

Take time to notice and enjoy something special you see on your lunch hour today. Go barefoot. Or walk on the beach at sunset. For as we get older, it is not the things we did that we often regret, but the things we didn't do.

.
Author Unknown

Two churches

There once were two churches. One day, a homeless man came into town. He had not eaten for many days and was very hungry. He thought that he might be able to get a morsel to eat at one of the churches. The first church was huge -- a Gothic masterpiece, built of solid limestone, with a spire that seemed to reach into the heavens. When he tried to open the massive front door he found that it was locked. Then he saw a sign that said "Office" with an arrow pointing to his right.

When he walked into the office, he found himself in a large, well-lighted room. A secretary sat at the front desk, typing the church bulletin onto a computer. She looked up at the shabby man and frowned. "May I help you?" she asked crisply.

"Yes ma'am," the homeless man answered. "I am very hungry. Do you have any food here?"

"Indeed we do," the woman answered proudly. "This church has the largest food bank in the state. People from far and wide donate to it. It's been written up in all the papers."

"Then," the man said, "may I have something to eat?"

The woman looked him up and down. "Do you live here in town?" she asked. "I've never seen you before."

"No, ma'am. I'm just a traveler passing through."

The woman turned icy. "I see," she said, reaching into her desk drawer. She pulled out two sheets of paper and handed them to the man. "Please fill this out and bring it back to me. It's an application for assistance. The church board demands that everything be done properly and in good order here."

The homeless man took the papers, walked over to a small desk, sat down, and filled them out. Then he returned the application to the secretary. She looked over the papers and said, "Before we can give you anything, our Executive Board has to approve this. You're in luck. They meet tomorrow night. Come back Wednesday morning and we'll see if we can do anything for you."

"But I'm so hungry," the man said. "Maybe the minister can help me. May I see him?"

The secretary was clearly becoming agitated. "Do you have an appointment?"

"No, ma'am."

"You must have an appointment. Our minister is very busy. Right now he's meeting with the mayor and the committee to beautify our town. The pastor is a very important man. He's been written up in all the papers. You come back on Wednesday and maybe we can feed you. You don't need to see the minister about this."

The homeless man walked out of the church office and continued down the street. A few blocks later, he saw another church. This one was small and made of wood. It looked very poor. Inside he found a young man sweeping the floor between the old wooden pews. The young man looked up and smiled. "Welcome stranger," he said brightly. "What can we do for you?"

"May I see the minister or the secretary?" the homeless man asked.

The young man chuckled. "We don't have a secretary, but I'm the minister."

"Then," the homeless man said, "can I get something to eat from your food bank."

"I'm afraid we don't have one of those either," the minister said. "This church is so poor that our members barely have enough to feed themselves."

The homeless man turned to leave but was stopped by the minister. "But," the young man said, "my wife is fixing me lunch right now. It's not very fancy, but I'd he honored to share it with you. She will bring it to my office in a few minutes. Come in and eat with me."

A half hour later, the homeless man was just polishing off the last of a thick ham and cheese sandwich and a steaming bowl of homemade vegetable soup. Then the preacher's wife produced a small paper sack and an old thermos bottle. "Here are a few more sandwiches, sir, some cookies, and some hot coffee. You can return the thermos to me whenever you come back through town."

As the homeless man walked out of the town, He looked back to see the spire of the big church rising high above the rest of the buildings. He could not see the small church at all. Yet, He knew that it was there and praised His Father for the kind young minister and his generous wife. He would not forget them -- ever -- and neither would His Father.

The thermos bottle was, even then, sitting on the stoop of the little church. But instead of containing coffee, it was now overflowing with God's blessings.

.

Unfolding a rosebud


A young, new preacher was walking with an older, more seasoned preacher in the garden one day and feeling a bit insecure about what God had for him to do, he was inquiring of the older preacher. The older preacher walked up to a rosebush and handed the young preacher a rosebud and told him to open it without tearing off any petals.

The young preacher looked in disbelief at the older preacher and was trying to figure out what a rosebud could possibly have to do with his wanting to know the WILL OF GOD for his life and for his ministry.

Because of his high respect for the older preacher, he proceeded to TRY to unfold the rose, while keeping every petal intact... It wasn't long before he realized how impossible it was to do so.

Noticing the younger preacher's inability to unfold the rosebud while keeping it intact, the older preacher began to recite the following poem...


It is only a tiny rosebud,
A flower of God's design;
But I cannot unfold the petals
With these clumsy hands of mine.

The secret of unfolding flowers
Is not known to such as I.
GOD opens this flower so sweetly,
When in my hands they fade and die.

If I cannot unfold a rosebud,
This flower of God's design,
Then how can I think I have wisdom
To unfold this life of mine?

So I'll trust in Him for His leading
Each moment of every day.
I will look to Him for His guidance
Each step of the pilgrim way.

The pathway that lies before me,
Only my Heavenly Father knows.
I'll trust Him to unfold the moments,
Just as He unfolds the rose.

.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

2 things to ponder about moms

Mom and Dad were watching TV when Mom said, "I'm tired, and it's getting late. I think I'll go to bed."

She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches for the next day's lunches. Rinsed out the popcorn bowls, took meat out of the freezer for supper the following evening, checked the cereal box levels, filled the sugar container, put spoons and bowls on the table and started the coffee pot for brewing the next morning.

She then put some wet clothes in the dryer, put a load of clothes into the washer, ironed a shirt and secured a loose button.

She picked up the game pieces left on the table, put the phone back on the charger and put the telephone book into the drawer.

She watered the plants, emptied a wastebasket and hung up a towel to dry.

She yawned and stretched and headed for the bedroom.

She stopped by the desk and wrote a note to the teacher, counted out some cash for the field trip, and pulled a text book out from hiding under the chair.

She signed a birthday card for a friend, addressed and stamped the envelope and wrote a quick note for the grocery store. She put both near her purse.

Mom then washed her face with 3 in 1 cleanser, put on her Night solution & age fighting moisturizer, brushed and flossed her teeth and filed her nails.

Dad called out, "I thought you were going to bed." "I'm on my way," she said. She put some water into the dog's dish and put the cat outside, then made sure the doors were locked and the patio light was on.

She looked in on each of the kids and turned out their bedside lamps and TV's, hung up a shirt, threw some dirty socks into the hamper, and had a brief conversation with the one up still doing homework.

In her own room, she set the alarm; laid out clothing for the next day, straightened up the shoe rack. She added three things to her 6 most important things to do list She said her prayers, and visualized the accomplishment of her goals.

About that time, Dad turned off the TV and announced to no one in particular. "I'm going to bed."

And he did - without another thought.

Two things to ponder:

1. Any thing extraordinary here about moms?

2. Why moms live longer?

Now: Go to bed!

.

Dear Mom

Dear Mom,

Our Scoutmaster told us all to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and worried. We are OK. Only one of our tents and two sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for Chad when it happened.

Oh yes, please call Chad's mother and tell her that he's OK. He can't write because of the cast. I got to ride on one of the search and rescue jeeps. It was neat. We never would have found him in the dark if it hadn't been for the lightning.

Scoutmaster Webb got mad at Chad for going on a hike alone without telling anyone. Chad said he did tell him, but it was during the fire so he probably didn't hear him.

Did you know that if you put a gas can on a fire, the gas can will blow up? Billy is going to look weird until his hair grows back.

We will be home on Saturday if Scoutmaster Webb gets the car fixed. It wasn't his fault about the wreck. The brakes worked OK when we left. Scoutmaster Webb said that with a car that old you to have to expect something to break down; that's probably why he can't get insurance on it. We think it's a neat car. He doesn't care if we get it dirty, and if it's hot, sometimes he lets us ride in the tailgate. It gets pretty hot with ten people in a car.

Scoutmaster Webb is a neat guy. Don't worry, he is a good driver. In fact, he is teaching Terry how to drive. But he only lets him drive on the mountain roads where there isn't any traffic. All we ever see up there are logging trucks.

Guess what? We have all passed our first aid merit badges. When Dave dove in the lake and cut his arm, we got to see how a tourniquet works.

Also, Wade and I threw up. Scoutmaster Webb said it probably was just food poisoning from the leftover chicken. He said they got sick that way with the food they ate in prison.

I'm so glad he got out and became our scoutmaster. He said he sure figured out how to get things done better while he was doing his time.

I have to go now. We are going into town to mail our letters and buy bullets.

Don't worry about anything. We are fine.

Love, Johnny

P. S. How long has it been since I had a tetanus shot?


.

Mothers dictionary (contd.)

AIRPLANE: What Mom impersonates to get a 1-yr.-old to eat strained beets.

ALIEN: What Mom would suspect had invaded her house if she spotted a child-sized creature cleaning up after itself.

APPLE: Nutritious lunch-time dessert which children will trade for cupcakes.

BABY: 1) Dad, when he gets a cold. 2) Mom's youngest child, even if he's 42.

BATHROOM: a room used by the entire family, believed by all (except Mom) to be self-cleaning.

"BECAUSE": Mom's reason for having kids do things which can't be explained logically.

BED AND BREAKFAST: Two things the kids will never make for themselves.

CARPET: Expensive floor covering used to catch spills and clean mud off shoes.

CAR POOL: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest, with the biggest bunch of kids, who have had the most sugar.

CHINA: Legendary nation reportedly populated by children who love leftover vegetables.

COOK: 1) Act of preparing food for consumption. 2) Mom's other name.

COUCH POTATO: What Mom finds under the sofa cushions after the kids eat dinner.

DATE: Infrequent outings with Dad where Mom can enjoy worrying about the kids in a different setting.

DRINKING GLASS: Any carton or bottle left open in the fridge.

DUST: Insidious interloping particles of evil that turn a home into a battle zone.

EAR: A place where kids store dirt.

EAT: What kids do between meals, but not at them.

EMPTY NEST: See "WISHFUL THINKING."

ENERGY: Element of vitality kids always have an oversupply of until asked to do something.

"EXCUSE ME": One of Mom's favorite phrases, reportedly used in past times by children.

EYE: The highly susceptible optic nerve which, according to Mom, can be "put out" by anything from a suction-arrow to a carelessly handled butter knife.

FABLE: A story told by a teenager arriving home after curfew.

FOOD: The response Mom usually gives in answer to the question "What's for dinner tonight?" See "SARCASM"

FROZEN: 1) A type of food. 2) How hell will be when Mom lets her daughter date an older guy with a motorcycle.

GARBAGE: A collection of refuse items, the taking out of which Mom assigns to a different family member each week, then winds up doing herself.

GENIUSES: Amazingly, all of Mom's kids.

GUM: Adhesive for the hair.

HAMPER: A wicker container with a lid, usually surrounded by, but not containing, dirty clothing.

HANDI-WIPES: Pants, shirt-sleeves, drapes, etc.

HANDS: Body appendages which must be scrubbed raw with volcanic soap and sterilized in boiling water immediately prior to consumption of the evening meal.

HINDSIGHT: What Mom experiences from changing too many diapers.

HOMEMADE BREAD: An object of fiction like the Fountain of Youth and the Golden Fleece.

ICE: Cubes of frozen water which would be found in small plastic tray if kids or husbands ever filled the darn things instead of putting them back in the freezer empty.

INSIDE: That place that will suddenly look attractive to kids once Mom has spent a minimum of half an hour getting them ready to go outside.

"I SAID SO": Reason enough, according to Mom.

JACKPOT: When all the kids stay at friends' homes for the night.

JEANS: Which, according to kids, are appropriate for just about any occasion, including church and funerals.

JOY RIDE: Going somewhere without the kids.

JUNK: Dad's stuff.

KETCHUP: The sea of tomato-based goop kids use to drown the dish that Mom spent hours cooking and years perfecting to get the seasoning just right.

KISS: Mom medicine.

LAKE: Large body of water into which a kid will jump should his friends do so.

LEMONADE STAND: Complicated business venture where Mom buys powdered mix, sugar, lemons, and paper cups, and sets up a table, chairs, pitchers and ice for kids who sit there for three to six minutes and net a profit of 15 cents.

LIE: An "exaggeration" Mom uses to transform her child's papier-mache volcano science project into a Nobel Prize-winning experiment and a full-ride scholarship to Harvard.

LOSERS: See "Kids' Friends"

MAKEUP: Lipstick, eyeliner, blush, etc. which ironically make Mom look better while making her young daughter look "like a tramp."

MAYBE: No.

MILK: A healthful beverage which kids will gladly drink once it's turned into junk food by the addition of sugar and cocoa.

"MOMMMMMM!": The cry of a child on another floor who wants something.

MUSH: 1) What a kid loves to do with a plateful of food. 2) Main element of Mom's favorite movies.

NAILS: A hard covering on the end of the finger, which Mom can never have a full set of due to pitching for batting practice, opening stubborn modeling clay lids and removing heat ducts to retrieve army men and/or doll clothing

PANIC: What a mother goes through when the darn wind-up swing stops.

OCEAN: What the bathroom floor looks like after bath night for kids, assorted pets, two or three full-sized towels and several dozen toy boats, cars and animals.

OPEN: The position of children's mouths when they eat in front of company.

OVERSTUFFED RECLINER: Mom's nickname for Dad.

PENITENTIARY: Where children who don't eat their vegetables or clean their rooms eventually end up, according to Mom.

PETS: Small, furry creatures which follow kids home so Mom will have someone else to clean up after.

PIANO: A large, expensive musical instrument which, after thousands of dollars worth of lessons and constant harping by Mom, kids will refuse to play in front of company.

PURSE: A handbag in which Mom carries the checkbook and keys she can never find because they're buried under tissues, gum wrappers, a plastic container full of cereal, toys from a fast-food restaurant, a teddy bear, a football, wallpaper samples, a grocery list and several outdated coupons.

QUIET: A state of household serenity which occurs before the birth of the first child and occurs again after the last child has left for college.

RAINCOAT: Article of clothing Mom bought to keep a child dry and warm, rendered ineffective because it's in the bottom of a locker stuffed in a book bag or because the child refuses to wear "the geeky thing."

REFRIGERATOR: Combination art gallery and air-conditioner for the kitchen

ROOM MOTHER: A position of great honor and responsibility bestowed on a mom who inadvertently misses a PTA meeting.

SCHOOL PLAY: Sadistic ritual in which adults derive pleasure from watching offspring stumble through coarse reenactments of famous historic events.

SCREAMING: Home P.A. system.

SNOWSUITS: Warm, padded outer garments that, when completely zipped and snapped performs two important functions: Protecting children from the cold and reminding them that they have to go to the bathroom.

SOAP: A cleaning agent Mom puts on the sink on the off-chance one of her kids will accidentally grab it while reaching for the towel.

SPIT: All-purpose cleaning fluid especially good on kids' faces.

SPOILED ROTTEN: What the kids become after as little as 15 minutes with Grandma.

SWEATER: Magically charmed article of clothing that can ward away colds, flu and even pneumonia.

SUNDAY BEST: Attractive, expensive children's clothing made of a fabric which attracts melted chocolate and grape juice.

TEACHER CONFERENCE: A meeting between Mom and that person who has yet to understand her child's "special needs."

TERRIBLE TWO'S: Having both kids at home all summer.

"THAT WAY": How kids shouldn't look at moms if they know what's good for them. Also applies to how they talk.

TOWELS: See "FLOOR COVERINGS"

TRAMP: A woman with two kids and no stretch marks.

TROUBLE: Area of nonspecific space a child can always be sure to be in.

UMPTEENTH: Highly conservative estimate of the number of times Mom must instruct her offspring to do something before it actually gets done.

UTOPIA: See "BUBBLE BATH"

VACATION: Where you take the family to get away from it all, only to find it there, too.

VITAMINS: Tiny facsimiles of cave people Mom forces you to swallow each morning as part of her sinister plot to have you grow up to be "Just like Daddy."

WALLS: Complete set of drawing paper for kids that comes with every room

WASHING MACHINE: Household appliance used to clean blue jeans, permanent ink markers, loose change, homework, tissues and wads of gum

"WHEN YOUR FATHER GETS HOME": Standard measurement of time between crime and punishment.

XOXOXOXO: Mom salutation guaranteed to make the already embarrassing note in a kid's lunch box even more mortifying.

XYLOPHONE: Small toy musical instrument often given as gifts to children who show their appreciation by playing the stupid thing constantly, over and over, all day long! See also "DRUMS"

YARD SALE: Heart-wrenching emotional process wherein Mom plans to sell kid's outdated toys and clothing that she decides at the last minute are treasured mementos she can't bear to part with.

"YIPPEE!": What Mom would jump up and shout if the school year was changed to 12 months. See also "YAHOO!"

ZILLION: Amount of times Mom must have gone to the supermarket already this week.

ZUCCHINI: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed - before kids refuse to eat it.

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Mom's tips

Mom's tips out of the parenting manual: 


Household tips:

It is possible to make a bottle, change a diaper, and wind the automatic swing without remembering your full name or the day of the week.

It is possible to take a knot out of wet shoelaces with your teeth.

You don't need to figure out how to work the sewing machine to be a good mother.

Girl Scout patches can be attached with a hot glue gun and stapler.

Any machine that makes homemade bread or sews makes a good car jack.


Time Management:

There is no such thing as a quick walk around the block with children. Every five steps you will have to stop to pick a flower in your neighbor's yard, toss a large rock, and wait for a snail to move.

During the first eight seconds of a phone conversation, it is possible for children to go into the refrigerator, stuff an entire box of raisins up their nose, eat all of the expensive cheese, and hog-tie the cat with the jumprope.

Trying to dress a toddler in a hurry is more difficult than stuffing a giant octopus into a loose mesh bag.


On Giving:

It's possible to make a gift out of a shoebox, scotchtape, and aluminum foil.

Grandparents will love a gift made out of a shoebox, scotch tape, and aluminum foil.

Any toy that requires assembly will never look like the picture on the box.

Any toy that requires assembly will never be as fun to play with as the box.


Food:

Red Popsicles and yellow Kool-Aid will make an orange stain on white silk blouse.

Nothing will get peanut butter out of the VCR.

Be suspicious of any food that comes in blue.

Organization:

No matter how many hours you spend packing the car for a quick trip to the store, you will always forget the one item the baby will need the most.

You can create extra space in your livingroom by putting the wooden blocks under the footrest of the recliner, stacking the Legos around the television set, and sliding the Hot Wheels track between the encyclopedia collection in the bookshelf. Or you can save time by moving all of your furniture into the garage.

Most ovens are large enough to store train track, a stack of puzzles, and a Barbie Camper.


Art:

There is no such thing as a bad singing voice.

Learn to paint with your fingers and make mud-pies with your toes without worrying about what the carpet will look like.

A paper with a purple crayon scribble on it might be a masterpiece to your child.


Inalienable truths:

Treat your children the way you want other people to treat them.

Never leave a PTA meeting to use the restroom.

There will never be a realistic "mother-of-two" Barbie.

The most important things you know about being a mother - you learn from your children.

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Bless you

I asked the Lord to bless you
As I prayed for you today
To guide you and protect you
As you go along the way.

His love is always with you
His promises are true,
And when we give Him all our cares
He will always see us through.

So when the road you're traveling on
Seems difficult at best
Just remember I'm here praying
And God will do the rest.

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Credits: Morbitzer

Friendship vs Love

Friendship is a quiet walk in the park with the one you trust
Love is when you feel like you are the only two around

Friendship is when they gaze into your eyes and you know they care
Love is when they gaze into your eyes and it warms your heart

Friendship is being close even when you are far apart
Love is when you can still feel their hand on your heart when they are not near

Friendship is hoping that they experience the very best
Love is when you bring them the very best

Friendship occupies your mind
Love occupies your soul

Friendship is knowing that you will always try to be there when in need
Love is when you will give up everything to be at their side

Friendship is a warm smile in the winter
Love is a warming touch that sends a pulse through your heart

Love is a beautiful smile to which nothing compares
A tender laugh, which opens your heart
A single touch that melts away your fears
A smell that reminds you of the tenderness of heaven
A voice that reminds you of the innocence of youth

Friendship can survive without love
Love cannot live without friendship.

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10 Reasons

Top 10 reasons why God created Eve:

10. God was worried that Adam would frequently become lost in the garden because he would not ask for directions.

9. God knew that one day Adam would require someone to locate and hand him the remote.

8. God knew Adam would never go out and buy himself a new fig leaf when his wore out and would therefore need Eve to buy one for him.

7. God knew Adam would never be able to make a doctor's, dentist's or haircut appointment by himself.

6. God knew Adam would never remember which night to put the garbage on the curb.

5. God knew if the world was to be populated, men would never be able to handle the pain and discomfort of childbearing.

4. God knew that as the keeper of the garden, Adam would never remember where he left his tools.

3. God knew that Adam would need someone to blame his troubles on when he was caught hiding in the garden.

2. The Bible says, " It is not good for man to be alone."

1. When God finished the creation of Adam, He stepped back, ran his fingers through his beard and said, "Hmm... I can do better than that."

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3 Nurses

Today, May 6th is the National Nurses Day.

Three nurses all arrived at the gates of Heaven at the same time and were met by Saint Peter. St Peter asked one nurse, "How have you spent your life?"

She replied, "I was an emergency room nurse. I was stressed out a lot and we couldn't save everyone, but we did help many and did a lot of good."

Saint Peter said, "Go right in!" He asked the next nurse, "How did you spend your life?" She answered, "I was a hospice nurse. It was depressing some times because as you know, we are there to help the terminally ill and all the patients die, but still I think we helped a lot of people and did some good."

Saint Peter said,"Go right in!" He turned to the third nurse and asked, "How have you spent your life?" She replied, "I was a managed care nurse for an HMO."

Saint Peter pulled out a calculator, computer, procedures manuals and a slide rule. After much calculating he turned to the last nurse and said, "I can approve you for three days in Heaven."

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Plant your gardens

It's time to plant our gardens.  As you plant, may we suggest the following  rules for your garden planting:

PLANT three rows of squash:  
1. Squash gossip  
2. Squash criticism  
3. Squash indifference

PLANT three rows of peas:  
1. Purity  
2. Patience  
3. Perseverance  

PLANT six rows of lettuce:  
1. Let us be unselfish and loyal  
2. Let us be faithful to duty  
3. Let us search the scriptures  
4. Let us not be weary in well-doing  
5. Let us be obedient in all things  
6. Let us Love one another  

NO GARDEN is complete without turnips:  
1. Turn up for church,prayer service, and Bible study  
2. Turn up with a smile, even when things are difficult  
3. Turn up with determination to do your best for God's cause.  

After planting, may you "Grow in Grace and in the knowledge of our Lord  and Savior Jesus Christ". 2 Peter 3:18

If Jesus came to your house


If Jesus came to your house to spend a day or two,
If He came unexpectedly, I wonder what you'd do.
Oh, I know you'd give your nicest room to such an honored Guest.
And all the food you'd serve to Him would be the very best.
And you would keep assuring Him you're glad to have Him there.
That serving Him in your own home is joy beyond compare.

But, when you saw Him coming, would you meet Him at the door?
With arms outstretched in welcome to your heavenly Visitor?
Or would you have to change your clothes before you let Him in?
Or hide some magazines and put the Bible where they'd been?
Would you turn off the radio and hope He hadn't heard?
And wish you hadn't uttered that last, loud, nasty word?

Would you hide your worldly music and put some hymn books out?
Could you let Jesus walk right in, or would you rush about?
And I wonder, if the Savior spent a day or two with you,
Would you go right on doing the things you always do?
Would you go right on saying the things you always say?
Would life for you continue as it does from day to day?

Would your family conversation keep up its usual pace?
And would you find it hard each meal to say a table grace?
Would you sing the songs you always sing, and read the books you read?
And let Him know the things on which your mind and spirit feed?
Would you take Jesus with you everywhere you'd planned to go?
Or would you, maybe, change your plans for just a day or so?

Would you be glad to have Him meet your very closest friends?
Or would you hope they'd stay away until His visit ends?
Would you be glad to have Him stay forever on and on?
Or would you sigh with great relief when He at last was gone?
It might be interesting to know the things that you would do,
If Jesus Christ in person came to spend some time with you.

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Winning


Winning is giving your best self away
Winning is serving with grace every day
You'll know that you've won when your friends say it's true.
"I like who I am when I'm around you.
You look for the best in the others you see
And you help us become who we're trying to be."

Winning is helping someone who's down
It's sharing a smile instead of a frown.

It's giving your children a hug by the fire
And sharing the values and dreams that inspire.

It's giving your parents the message "I care.
Thanks, Mom and Dad, for being so fair.''

Winners are willing to give more than get
Their favors are free, you're never in debt.

Winning is giving one hundred percent
It's paying your dues, your taxes, your rent
It's trying and doing, not crying and stewing.

Winners respect every color and creed,
They share and they care for everyone's need.

The losers keep betting that winning is getting
But there's one of God's laws that they keep forgetting
And this is the Law you can live and believe
The more that you give, the more you'll receive!

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Cannot say the Lord's Prayer


I cannot say "Our ",
if I live in a water-tight spiritual compartment;
if I think a special place in Heaven is reserved for my denomination.

I cannot say " Father ",
if I do not demonstrate the relationship in my daily life.

I cannot say " who art in Heaven ",
if I am so occupied with the earth that I am laying up no treasure there.

I cannot say " Hallowed be Thy Name ",
if I, who am called by His name, am not holy.

I cannot say " Thy Kingdom come ",
if I am not doing all in my power to hasten its coming.

I cannot say "Thy will be done ",
if I am questioning, resentful of or disobedient to His will for me.

I cannot say " on earth as it is in Heaven ",
if I am not prepared to devote my life here to His service.

I cannot say " Give us this day our daily bread ",
if I'm living on past experiences.

I cannot say " forgive us our trespasses as we forgive them that trespass against us",
if I harbour a grudge against anyone.

I cannot say " Lead us not into temptation ",
if I deliberately place myself, or remain in a position where I am likely to be tempted.

I cannot say " Deliver us from the evil one ",
if I am not prepared to fight in the spiritual realm with the weapon of prayer.

I cannot say " For Thine is the Kingdom ",
if I do not accord the King the disciplined obedience of a loyal subject.

I cannot say " (Thine is) The power ",
if I fear what men may do; or what my neighbour may think.

I cannot say " (Thine is) The glory ",
if I am seeking glory for myself.

I cannot say " Forever and forever ",
if my horizon is bounded by the things of time.

I cannot say " Amen ",
if I do not also add, " Cost what it may, "
for to say this prayer will cost EVERYTHING.

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The candle


This is the story about a small candle carried by a man who was climbing the stairs of a lighthouse.

In their way up to the top, the candle asked the man, "Where are we going?"

"We're going to the top of this lighthouse and give signals to the big ships on the ocean," the man answered.

"What? How could it be possible for me with my small light to give signals to those big ships?"

"They will never be able to see my light", replied the candle weakly.

"That's your part. If your light is small, let it be. All you have to do is keep burning and leave the rest to me", said the man.

A little later, they arrived at the top of the lighthouse where there was a big lamp with a loop behind it. Then the man lit the lamp with the light of the candle and instantly, the place shone so brightly that the ships on the ocean could see its light.

With our being and our limitations, we're hardly able to do any meaningful things. Yet, one thing you should bear in mind is that your life is like a small candle in God's powerful hand. All your abilities and expertise will remain as a small light if you don't put your life in God's hand. On the contrary, even if your light is so small or dim, if you entrust all your life to God, he is able to make your small light into a big one that brings blessings to many people.

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10 tips for life

1. Take time to dream
-it hitches your soul to the stars.

2. Take time to work
-it is the price of success.

3. Take time to think
-it is the source of power.

4. Take time to play
-it is the secret of youth.

5. Take time to read
-it is the foundation of knowledge.

6. Take time to worship
-it is the highway of reverence and washes the dust of earth from your eyes.

7. Take time to laugh
-it helps with life's loads.

8. Take time for health
-it is the true treasure of life.

9. Take time for friends
-they are the source of happiness.

10. Take time to love
-it is the source of joy.


Credits: Coach Univ

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Mean Moms

Here is an article I came across about mean mothers.
---------


Was your Mom mean? I know mine was. We had the meanest mother in the whole world! While other kids ate candy for breakfast, we had to have cereal, eggs, and toast. When others had a Pepsi and a Twinkie for lunch, we had to eat sandwiches. And you can guess our mother fixed us a dinner that was different from what other kids had, too.

Mother insisted on knowing where we were at all times. You’d think we were convicts in a prison. She had to know who our friends were, and what we were doing with them. She insisted that if we said we would be gone for an hour, we would be gone for an hour or less. We were ashamed to admit it, but she had the nerve to break the Child Labor Laws by making us work. We had to wash the dishes, make the beds, learn to cook, vacuum the floor, do laundry, and all sorts of cruel jobs. I think she would lie awake at night thinking of more things for us to do.

She always insisted on us telling the truth the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. By the time we were teenagers, she could read our minds. Then, life was really tough! Mother wouldn’t let our friends just honk the horn when they drove up. They had to come up to the door so she could meet them while everyone else could date when they were 12 or 13, we had to wait until we were 17.

Because of our mother we missed out on lots of things other kids experienced. None of us have ever been caught shoplifting, vandalizing other’s property or ever arrested for any crime. It was all her fault. We never got drunk, took up smoking, stayed out all night, or a million other things other kids did. Sundays were reserved for church, and we never missed once. We knew better than to ask to spend the night with a friend on Saturdays.

Now that we have left home, we are all God-fearing, educated, honest adults. We are doing our best to be mean parents just like Mom was. I think that is what’s wrong with the world today. It just doesn’t have enough mean moms anymore.


Author unknown

Mom's rules of thumb

The later you stay up, the earlier your child will wake up the next morning.

For a child to become clean, something else must become dirty.

Toys multiply to fill any space available.

The longer it takes you to make a meal, the less your child will like it.

Yours is always the only child who doesn’t behave.

If the shoe fits, it’s expensive.

The surest way to get something done is to tell a child not to do it.

The gooier the food, the more likely it is to end up on the carpet.

Backing the car out of the driveway causes your child to have to go to the bathroom.

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Mom's wisdom

Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.

There is always a lot to be thankful for if you take the time to look. For example: Begin by being thankful that wrinkles don’t hurt.

One reason to smile is that every seven minutes of every day someone in an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.

Car sickness is the feeling you get when have to fill the tank up with gas.

The best way to keep kids at home is to make a pleasant atmosphere and let the air out of their tires.

Families are like fudge - mostly sweet, with a few nuts.

Today’s mighty oak is just yesterday’s nut that held its ground.

Laughing helps. It’s like jogging on the inside.

Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.

If you can remain calm raising children, you just don’t have all the facts.

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Lipstick


A principal of a small middle school had a problem with a few of the older girls starting to use lipstick. When applying it in the bathroom they would then press their lips to the mirror and leave lip prints.

Before it got out of hand he thought of a way to stop it. He gathered all the girls together that wore lipstick and told them he wanted to meet with them in the ladies room at 2 pm. They gathered at 2 pm and found the principal and the school custodian waiting for them.

The principal explained that it was becoming a problem for the custodian to clean the mirror every night. He said he felt the ladies did not fully understand just how much of a problem it was and he wanted them to witness just how hard it was to clean. The custodian then demonstrated. He took a long brush on a handle out of a box.

He then dipped the brush in the nearest toilet, moved to the mirror and proceeded to remove the lipstick. That was the last day the girls pressed their lips on the mirror.

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Are you listening?

Are we really listening?

The next time your in conversation with someone think about this question for a second. Many times we're simply thinking of what we're going to say next, rather than actually listening to the person with a clear mind.

If you're guilty (as I sometimes am) of this at times there's some really bad news. The other person knows this as well. It's written all over our faces.

It's in the very words that we use to follow up with in our discussion with that person. The good news is that by making ourselves aware of the fact that we're not truly listening we can begin at that very moment correcting the problem. Make yourself aware of the importance of listening and you'll reap many rewards. It's one of life's most awesome facts that people are drawn to those who are good listeners.

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Credits: Josh Hinds

How to love yourself

Stop All Criticism - Criticism never changes a thing. Refuse to criticize yourself. Accept yourself exactly as you are. Everybody changes. When you criticize yourself, your changes are negative. When you approve of yourself, your changes are positive.

Don't Scare Yourself - Stop terrorizing yourself with your thoughts. It's a dreadful way to live. Find a mental image that gives you pleasure (mine is yellow roses), and immediately switch your scary thought to a pleasure thought.

Be Gentle And Kind And Patient - Be gentle with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be patient with yourself as you learn the new ways of thinking. Treat yourself as you would someone you really loved.

Be Kind To Your Mind - Self hatred is only hating your own thoughts. Don't hate yourself for having the thoughts. Gently change your thoughts.

Praise Yourself - Criticism breaks down the inner spirit. Praise builds it up. Praise yourself as much as you can. Tell yourself how well you are doing with every little thing.

Support Yourself - Find ways to support yourself. Reach out to friends and allow them to help you. It is being strong to ask for help when you need it.

Be Loving To Your Negatives - Acknowledge that you created them to fulfill a need. Now, you are finding new, positive ways to fulfill those needs. So, lovingly release the old negative patterns.

Take Care Of Your Body - Learn about nutrition. What kind of fuel does your body need to have optimum energy and vitality? Learn about exercise. What kind of exercise can you enjoy? Cherish and revere the temple you live in.

Mirror Work - Look into your eyes often. Express this growing sense of love you have for yourself. Forgive yourself looking into the mirror. Talk to your parents looking into the mirror. Forgive them too. At least once a day say: "I love you, I really love you."

Love Yourself .. Do It Now - Don't wait until you get well, or lose the weight, or get the new job, or the new relationship. Begin now - and do the best you can.


Credits: Louise L. Hay

Tears

Barbara was driving her six-year-old son, Benjamin, to his piano lesson.

They were late, and Barbara was beginning to think she should have cancelled it. There was always so much to do, and Barbara, a night-duty nurse at the local hospital, had recently worked extra shifts.

She was tired. The sleet storm and icy roads added to her tension. Maybe she should turn the car around.

"Mom!" Ben cried. "Look!" Just ahead, a car had lost control on a patch of ice. As Barbara tapped the brakes, the other car spun wildly rolled over, then crashed sideways into a telephone pole.

Barbara pulled over, skidded to a stop and threw open her door. Thank goodness she was a nurse - she might be able to help these unfortunate passengers.

Then she paused. What about Ben? She couldn't take him with her. Little boys shouldn't see scenes like the one she anticipated. But was it safe to leave him alone? What if their car were hit from behind?

For a brief moment Barbara considered going on her way. Someone else was sure to come along. No! "Ben, honey, promise me you'll stay in the car!"

"I will, Mommy," he said as she ran, slipping and sliding toward the crash site. It was worse than she'd feared. Two girls of high school age are in the car. One, the blonde on the passenger side, was dead, killed on impact.

The driver, however was still breathing. She was unconscious and pinned in the wreckage. Barbara quickly applied pressure to the wound in the teenager's head while her practiced eye catalogued the other injuries. A broken leg, maybe two, along with probable internal bleeding. But if help came soon, the girl would live.

A trucker had pulled up and was calling for help on his cellular phone. Soon Barbara heard the ambulance sirens. A few moments later she surrendered her lonely post to rescue workers.

"Good job," one said as he examined the driver's wounds. "You probably saved her life, ma'am." Perhaps.

But as Barbara walked back to her car a feeling of sadness overwhelmed her, especially for the family of the girl who had died. Their lives would never be the same. Oh God, why do such things have to happen?

Slowly Barbara opened her car door. What should she tell Benjamin? He was staring at the crash site, his blue eyes huge. "Mom," he whispered, "did you see it?"

"See what, Honey?" she asked.

"The angel, Mom! He came down from the sky while you were running to the car. And he opened the door, and he took that girl out."

Barbara's eyes filled with tears. "Which door, Ben?"

"The passenger side. He took the girl's hand, and they floated up to Heaven together"

"What about the driver?"

Ben shrugged. "I didn't see anyone else."

Later, Barbara was able to meet the families of the victims. They expressed their gratitude for the help she had provided. Barbara was able to give them something more - Ben's vision.

There was no way he could have known what happened to either of the passengers. Nor could the passenger door have been opened; Barbara had seen its tangle of immovable steel herself. Yet Ben's account brought consolation to a grieving family. Their daughter was safe in Heaven. And they would see her again.

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Prayers

In the past two days, we heard couple of bad news; Rohan Mathew who disappeared while swimming at Lake Lanier, and Jiby Yohannan's grandfather who passed away in India.

Let us remember these two families in our prayers and may Lord provide comfort and strength for these two families to handle these dificult times.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Hare and Tortoise - conclusion




Read part 1 here.

Read part 2
here.

Read part 3
here.

Read part 4
here.

Teamwork is mainly about situational leadership, letting the person with the relevant core competency for a situation take leadership. Note that neither the hare nor the tortoise gave up after failures. The hare decided to work harder and put in more effort after his failure. The tortoise changed his strategy because he was already working as hard as he could.

In life, when faced with failure, sometimes it is appropriate to work harder and put in more effort. Sometimes it is appropriate to change strategy and try something different. And sometimes it is appropriate to do both. The hare and the tortoise also learnt another vital lesson. When we stop competing against a rival and instead start competing against the situation, we perform far better.

These are the lessons we can learn from the hare and tortoise:
1. Fast and consistent will always beat slow and steady,
2. Work to your competencies,
3. Pooling resources and working as a team will always beat individual performers,
4. Never give up when faced with failure,
5. Compete against the situation - not against a rival.

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Mommy went to heaven

Mommy went to Heaven, but I need her here today,
My tummy hurts and I fell down, I need her right away.

Operator can you tell me how to find her in this book?
Is heaven in the yellow part, I don't know where to look.

Maybe if I call her, she will hurry home to me.
Is Heaven very far away, is it across the sea?

She's been gone a long, long time she needs to come home now!
I really need to reach her, but I simply don't know how.

Help me find the number please, is it listed under "Heaven?"
I can't read these big big words, I am only seven.

I'm sorry operator, I didn't mean to make you cry,
Is your tummy hurting too, or is there something in your eye?

If I call my church maybe they will know.
Mommy said when we need help that's where we should go.

I found the number to my church tacked up on the wall.
Thank you operator, I'll give them a call.

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Monday, May 3, 2010

Mom's dictionary


Mothers have their own dictionary.  Here are few words and phrases from their dictionary and their meanings:

Anticipation: "Just wait until your father gets home."

Receiving: "You are going to get it when we get home!"

Meeting a challenge: "What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you! Don't talk back to me!"

Logic: "If you fall out off that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

Medical Science: "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

Think Ahead: "If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job."

Humor: "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

Becoming an Adult: "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

Genetics: "You're just like your father."

Roots: "Do you think you were born in a barn?"

Wisdom of Age: "When you get to be my age, you will understand."

Justice: "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you. Then you'll see what it's like!"

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Flowers for mom


A man stopped at a flower shop to order some flowers to be wired to his mother who lived two hundred miles away.

As he got out of his car he noticed a young girl sitting on the curb sobbing.

He asked her what was wrong and she replied, "I wanted to buy a red rose for my mother.

But I only have seventy-five cents, and a rose costs two dollars."

The man smiled and said, "Come on in with me. I'll buy you a rose."

He bought the little girl her rose and ordered his own mother's flowers.

As they were leaving he offered the girl a ride home.

She said, "Yes, please! You can take me to my mother."

She directed him to a cemetery, where she placed the rose on a freshly dug grave.

The man returned to the flower shop, canceled the wire order, picked up a bouquet and drove the two hundred miles to his mother's house.

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The sandbox

A little boy was spending his Saturday morning playing in his sandbox. He had with him his box of cars and trucks, his plastic pail, and a shiny, red plastic shovel. In the process of creating roads and tunnels in the soft sand, he discovered a large rock in the middle of the sandbox.

The lad dug around the rock, managing to dislodge it from the dirt. With no little bit of struggle, he pushed and nudged the rock across the sandbox by using his feet. (He was a very small boy and the rock was very huge). When the boy got the rock to the edge of the sandbox, however, he found that he couldn't roll it up and over the wall.

Determined, the little boy shoved, pushed, and pried, but every time he thought he had made some progress, the rock tipped and then fell back into the sandbox.

The little boy grunted, struggled, pushed and shoved. But his only reward was to have the rock roll back, smashing his chubby fingers.

Finally he burst into tears of frustration. All this time the boy's father watched from his living room window as the drama unfolded. At the moment the tears fell, a large shadow fell across the boy and the sandbox. It was the boy's father.

Gently but firmly he said, "Son, why didn't you use all the strength that you had available?

Defeated, the boy sobbed back, "But I did, Daddy, I did! I used all the strength that I had!"

"No, son," corrected the father kindly. "You didn't use all the strength you had. You didn't ask me."

With that the father reached down, picked up the rock, and removed it from the sandbox.

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You never know

You never know when someone
might catch a dream from you.
Or something you say may open up the windows
of a mind that seeks light;
The way you live may not matter at all,
But you never know, it might.

And just in case it could be
that another's life, through you,
might possibly change for the better
with a better and brighter view,
it seems it might be worth a try
at pointing the way to the right;
Of course, it may not matter at all,
but then again, it might.

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Kingdom of God

The kingdom of heaven will be like ten students waiting for a professor to return to his office. They needed his signature to add his course, and the forms were due early the next day. Five were wise and five were foolish.

The wise ones brought something to eat while they waited, but the foolish ones did not. The professor was a long time in coming, and as they waited all afternoon, they got very hungry. The foolish ones said, "Give us some of your food." But the wise ones answered, "No, we only brought enough for ourselves, and there isn't enough to share. Go to the cafeteria and buy something."

But while they were on their way to the cafeteria, the professor arrived. He signed the forms of those who were waiting, then locked his office and went home. Later that evening, the others telephoned him at home and said, "Sir! Sir! Come back and sign our forms."

But he replied, "I tell you the truth, you are not my students." Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour (Matt 25:1-13).

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Dreamers

In that dark lonesome place
between a dream dreamed
and a dream realized,

I have left a little light for you
so you will know that someone cares
and believes in your dream.

Just where it becomes the most dark
and difficult to find your way,
there is the light I left for you.

It will light your way,
through the doubt, the confusion,
and the fears,

It will stay with you
all the way to the realization
of your dream.

And when your dream has come true,
please go back to that darkest place
where you have been,

And set the little light there to give heart
to the next sweet soul that braves the path
to his or her dreams.

Dreamers are the architects of greatness.
There wisdom lies within their souls.
Dream long enough and hard enough
and your dream can be attained.

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Sunday, May 2, 2010

Left handed

On a weekend evening, little Bobby who attends kindergarten was walking with is grandmother at a park, enjoying nature's beauty.

His grandmother remarked, "doesn't it look like an artist painted this scenery? Did you know God painted this just for you?"

Bobby said, "Yes, God did it and He did it with His left hand."

This confused his grandmother a bit, and she asked him "What makes you say God did this with His left hand"

"Well," said Bobby, "We learned at Sunday School last week that Jesus sits on God's right hand!"

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Groceries


There was a Christian lady who lived next door to an atheist. Everyday, when the lady prayed, the atheist guy could hear and he thought to himself, "She sure is crazy, praying all the time like that. Doesn't she know there isn't a God?"

Many times while she was praying, he would go to her house and harass her, saying "Lady, why do you pray all the time? Don't you know there is no God?"

But she kept on praying. One day, she ran out of groceries. As usual, she was praying to the Lord explaining her situation and thanking Him for what He was going to do.

As usual, the atheist heard her praying and thought to himself. "Hmm, I'll fix her."

He went to the grocery store, bought a whole bunch of groceries, took them to her house, dropped them off on the front porch, rang the doorbell and then hid in the bushes to see what she would do.

When she opened the door and saw the groceries, she began to praise the Lord with all her heart, jumping, singing and shouting' everywhere! The atheist then jumped out of the bushes and told her, "You old crazy lady, God didn't buy you those groceries, I bought those groceries!"

Well, she broke out and started running down the street, shouting and praising the Lord.

When he finally caught up with her, he asked what her problem was.  She said, "I knew the Lord would provide me with some groceries, but I  didn't know he was going to make the devil pay for them!"

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Hare and Tortoise - Race 4


Read part 1 here.

Read part 2 here.

Read part 3 here.


The hare and the tortoise, by this time, had become pretty good friends and they did some thinking together. Both realized that the last race (race 3) could have been run much better. So they decided to do the last race again, but to run as a team this time.

They started off, and this time the hare carried the tortoise till the riverbank. There, the tortoise took over and swam across with the hare on his back. On the opposite bank, the hare again carried the tortoise and they reached the finishing line together. They both felt a greater sense of satisfaction than they'd felt earlier.

The Moral:
It's good to be individually brilliant and to have strong core competencies; but unless you're able to work in a team and harness each other's core competencies, you'll always perform below par because there will always be situations at which you'll do poorly and someone else does well.

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Final exam on May 2

And finally, we made it through the year!!

All of you turned in all those BRS answers that were due - good job. We will have the finalized BRS grades posted next week.  You returned your text books so that we could replenish our text book supply.  All of you had smiles on your face and that met the required criteria to enter the exam hall.

We started off our class with revision.  I asked you for the set of questions that you anticipated to be on the test.  You were right 100%.  I am extremely happy to note that you knew (all) those questions beforehand.  The prayer was the only additional question that you did not mention. I had to ask you one prayer as part of Sunday school teachers' meeting, and you all did well.

I glanced through your answer sheets and all of you seem to have done beyond being well.  Have read all your answers, but not graded them yet.  I was having a bad headache after returning from church and hence could not do much on grading.  Will have your answers graded pretty soon.  Check back later for some sort of updates.

Meanwhile, I checked the grades you gave me.  According to your grading, I scored an average of 99.33 out of 100.  Thank you for being honest with your evaluations.  The biggest advantage you listed was not 'reading from the textbooks' and instead providing lectures. Almost all of you mentioned that you liked all those stories that you heard which were related to our lectures.  Some of you mentioned that this blog has become part of your daily online life.  There were other good things listed as strengths, but let me cut short.  When asked for any improvements, one area you suggested is not to have long lectures (not to continue lecture after the bell rings).

It was nice to have you in my class and we got to know each other.  Next time you meet me in the corridor, do not hesitate to say hello; feel free to swing by - just like how your seniors do so occasionally.

Wish you a great future and may you enjoy and experience the blessings and love from our God.

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